Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Wanna watch the Bachelorette with me? Week 7

I had to remind myself I was excited to watch this week.  But like I told Aubrey last week, previews always look more interesting than they are.  I'd hate to find out that all the drama is about a sandwich.

Drew confirms that this is a place for falling in love, which leaves us all breathing a sigh of relief!  Maybe someone could provide us with a list of places that aren't good for falling in love, you know just so we can avoid them.

Catherine passes on Sean's good wishes and Des says "that's so nice."  Which roughly translated means "I hate his guts" in ex girlfriend.

1x1 Brooks
I've noticed that Brooks hasn't had the traditional freak out that most first one on oners have.  That bodes well for him I think.

Des wants to see where he's at, and let him know where she is.  I think they're going to look at maps.

Just waiting for someone to say "cloud nine".  Op!  There it is.

Back at the hotel Chris smells the envelope as if Des actually delivered it herself.  Silly boy, Des probably didn't even choose the words and that certainly isn't her handwriting. 

They've shown close ups on several cats.  Is that something Madeira is known for or. . . ?

There's cloud nine again.

I really hope Aubrey is counting the times they use the word "family" in this conversation about hometowns.  On that note, I'm glad no one sits around and counts my words.  I probably say "freak" and "dude" a lot more than I care to admit.

1x1 Chris
Chris is really really really excited.  I think it would be fin to buy the bachelor/ette contestants a thesaurus next season instead of jewel toned hoodies. 

I'm remembering when I rode a boat to a smaller island on my honeymoon, and how it was nothing like this.  Mostly I got sprayed with water and a little sea sick.

They write a poem and Chris says, "It's not too bad." Chris, it's not too good either.

They throw the bottle out into the waves.  No one burst their bubble, but I can almost guarantee you that bottle smashed on the jagged rocks with in fifteen minutes.

Des: I want like three kids.  I don't have a number on it.
Even Olivia (my two-year-old) knows three is a number.

More poetry.  Ugh.  You know what?  Chris has to be the one she picks in the end because other wise his cheesy poetry would have gotten him sent home weeks ago.  You remember this?  Watch it.  It's pretty intense stuff.

1x1 Michael G
Do we still have to call him Michael G now that Mikey is gone?  Probably not.

Des is embarrassed to say that they are exploring the city.  It's easily the third "exploring" date of the season.  So she says they're going to take in the culture and take in everything Madeira has to offer.  But then yeah, she admits it's basically exploring.

Micheal looks like his mom scrubbed him up and dressed him for church in seersucker.  He seems to be missing his bow tie though.

Des makes Michael feel like he can love again.  I've seen this movie before.

2x1 Zak and Drew
Zak says he's ready to race.  And I'm wondering how much money he spends on whitening his teeth each month.

It's a race!  (name that movie)

Drew continues to remind us he's never felt this way before.  He's like 90% sure it's love, but there's always the chance it could be something he ate.

Zak says he doesn't know where he would meet the next girl if Des doesn't choose him.  I suggest twitter.

Discussion with Chris Harrison/Rose Ceremony
Chris points out that Des has never been to Europe AGAIN.  He might as well say, "You grew up really poor." (I'm not saying you're poor if you've never been to Europe, but they just like to keep pointing that out this season, ya know.  For the record, I have never been to Europe.)

So there is like ten minutes of this show left and no drama.  What were we seeing on the previews last week?  Will it all go down during these last ten minutes?

Des hands out the roses, no one cries, Michael is very understanding and quite the gentleman. . . did Olivia step on the remote and change the channel?  I don't think this is the Bachelorette.

Next week, hometowns!  Only two of my four picks will be making it, Zak and Brooks.  Aubrey did better and she has three of her picks making it, Brooks, Drew and Chris.  Dang it, I knew Chris would go far I just didn't want to admit it!


  1. i'm sitting at my desk at work basically laughing out loud which is great for you and not so great for me. luckily no one is in here right now. sorry to disappoint, but i didn't keep track of "family". i was far to busy counting the 70 times the word LOVE was said. they probably should just start saying finish line instead which i actually didn't count in the 70.

    1. I always laughed when reading blogs at work. My students would be like, "What is SO funny?" with disdain. So I would try to explain and they would roll their eyes and go back to work.

      Love man. But do you remember that conversation with Brooks where he was like, "My family is really important. If I introduce you to my family I really hope my family will like you and that you will like my family." And I wonder if he's ever heard of the words "they" and "them".

    2. i do remember that conversation. i'm surprised the word family didn't stand out to me a little more.


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